How’s this for a CPU assist?
Imagine a world where Larry Bird, Bill Russell, Paul Pierce and Isaiah Thomas played on exactly the same Boston Celtic team. Or Chuck, Dr. J, the Answer and the Process on the same Philly Sixers one. Well imagine no more (sort of). Because today that’s the digital world for you. And from the sweat of the King, LeBron James, to the saliva on Steph Curry’s gum-shield, NBA 2K18’s graphics are so good it damn well looks like the amazing feat is actually coming true.
Now when it comes to 2K if it’s not in the game like EA used to be then it’s going to be as close as you can get to this fantasy league, like sitting courtside with Rihanna. As close as you can be to something that’s more than just a video game.
But this aint any regular, run of the mill video game.
2K18 has all the bells and whistles to get you as close as possible to the digital hardwood and we aren’t just talking about the My Career mode. From the streets to the stadium mode Houston Rockets All Star P.G. and almost MVP James Harden’s cover star turn is showing you just how realistic this game is like the rendering of every hair on The Beard’s chinny, chin chin. And if you don’t believe this hype, a trailer set to Mobb Deep’s hip hop classic ‘Shook Ones (Part II)’ (Rest Peacefully Prodigy) in a soundtrack that features Nas, Naughty By Nature, Toronto Raptors owner Drake and the NBA and Portland Trail Blazers own resident rapper and All-Star Damien Lillard, AKA Dame D.O.L.L.A. is as eagerly anticipated and exciting to hoop heads and gaming geeks as leaking an ‘Avengers: Infinity War’ trailer from Comic Con.
It’s hard to fathom it’s been a year since that Imagine Dragons trailer but the friction excitement for the 2018 model is more heat inducing than rubbing two sticks together and as palpable as a fan rubbing their hands together for the start of the real 2017/2018 NBA regular season.
And covering a special edition of this game across the XBox and Playstation platforms the Notorious Big, ‘Most Dominant Ever’, Shaquille O’Neal could cover more games here than he does as a host on TNT. A new explosive mode were you can play a 15 man roster of your favourite franchises All-Time team will surely see him suit up in the Florida colors of the Miami Heat and Orlando Magic again. Hey he could even make the cut for the best the Phoenix Suns and Cleveland Cavaliers have to offer. But for the Big Fundmanetal that has played for almost everyone-even the Boston Celtics-he stands most proudly like he does in the purple and gold rafters and as a statue outside STAPLES as a legendary Los Angeles Laker. In an NBA legacy team for 2K18 that also features pictured teammate Kobe Bryant, Magic Johnson, James Worthy, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Wilt Chamberlian and even Pau Gasol finally getting his due. This Magnificent Seven surely to be joined by the legendary likes of the logo Jerry West, the Fire to his Ice Elgin Baylor, Gail Goodrich, Jamaal Wilkes, surely Minneapolis Lakers, first superstar George Mikan and who knows when it’s all said and done Lonzo Ball. And how about Big Shot Bob, Robert Horry to go along with Big Game and the big fella?
That just leaves one…hello Kwame Brown or Smush Parker!
Hell the Lakers could add someone’s Grandma (whats up Larry Johnson) and the result would still be ths makings of a Hollywood ending. This line-up has Dream Team written all over it like Barcelona in 1992. Proving that at least in todays digtal world fantasies come true, even if you thought it was out of this league.
Ready to play?
RIP OKC. Dame Time Clocks Thunder’s Reign From Way Downtown PDX
Even two games down the Thunder bolt boys joked like the last laugh that was yet to be delivered, like this what’s the 4-1 punchline. Zero to zero for the best series of these NBA Playoffs so far, Russell Westbrook rocked the baby at Damian Lillard, before mocking his wrist watch celebration like he did Laker meme Lance Stephenson’s air guitar strumming one with D’Angelo Russell ice in his veins. All before Paul George double pumped a dunk as time expired on a game that was already decided way before the horn blared.
“It is the unemotional, reserved, calm, detached warrior who wins, not the hothead seeking vengeance and not the ambitious seeker of fortune.”
But then last night before posting that Sun Tzu quote on Instagram in this art of war. In the face of P.G. the PDX P.G. beat the buzzer as Dame Time struck from way downtown RIP City. With an Austin 3:16 bottom line to give OKC the history engraved tombstone and the Portland Trail Blazers a legendary storied, legacy making championship belt for this classic series in hardwood history.
Reminding us of that time Charles Barkley responded to a Nike barbershop ad featuring former Golden State Warriors Chris Webber and Latrell Sprewell joking about dunking on him by putting all the points on them in the following game and running past them on the bench draped in dejected towels shouting, “put that in a f###### commercial!”
Colder than February. More ruthless than a convertible in Summer.
37 feet high and rising from deep. Deep as the halfcourt abyss. With the this time of season cherry blossoms blooming outside Portlandia’s Moda Center, the City of Roses was handing everyone from basketballs Oklahoma home funeral flowers. And leading the precession, hearse wrapping it up like his killer bars, Dame D.O.L.L.A was right on the money like exact change only please, waving goodbye. Even if Paul George walking off in defeat like LeBron James and getting his Vlade Divac on in a press conference more awkward than a blind date with an ex called it a “bad shot”. To which the great Dame simply replied with a tweeted “lol” (see also, laugh and last). He better Big Shot Bobby Horry check a newspaper or something. Dame Time didn’t just beat the buzzer. He took baby powder to it. As Dame had all the Louis Armstrong time in the world with ten on the clock and the last shot in this final frame to dribble drive or dish. But instead, toying with George like a cat does a mouse, as David beat Goliath like Jerry did Tom, Lillard had the sand to set up shop, his spot and his shot from what looked like a bunker. A hole in one, with the cocksure confidence of Tiger Woods putting for Masters glory in Augusta and embracing his kids, two decades after doing the same with his pops all for the green jacket.
From this master, like a tap in putt with no Mulligan to carry, this was always going in. Nothing but net. All water like those Thunder tears. O.K. now that was a 3.
And to think I swore I wouldn’t go back on social media until after the new Avengers movie came out, but DAMN Dame Time! Spoiler alert, this is the new ‘Endgame’ now.
Cousy. Pettit. Sam Jones. Wilt. Chuck Barkley. M.J. And now the Dame train as the legendary Lillard goes hard to join this lineage as the only players to hit 50 in a playoff clinching game. And what a way to do it, fading away to clock out of the game and series 118-115 for the greatest Portland playoff moment since the G.O.A.T’s shrug. As mobbed by teammates on the floor he sank into, telling Russ to ‘Get Out’ his house. Peeling off like Jordan, Damian all on his own like a devil, GIF turned into an instant meme, as he turned the Thunder into a memory (you know the one were everyone loses their mind around that smirking kid with glasses in the raincoat? Well now guess which superheroes face is super imposed?). Staring into the camera with that look you know was for Russell Westbrook.
What a whole mood.
Whose left holding the baby now?
Dame didn’t even have to check his watch. Why? Him, her, them. They all knew what time it was. His. As Dame Lillard just did it in the Oregon home of Nike. Shoe dog like Phil Knight, running off victory for the courtside crowd, including legendary comedian Cedric the Entertainer for this last laugh lap. As this Gladiator hit one of the best and biggest shot fired in NBA history. Subliminal and literal.
Are you not entertained?
Two-time U Sports MVP Kadre Gray declares for NBA Draft
Two-time U Sports basketball player of the year Kadre Gray of the Laurentian Voyageurs has declared for the 2019 NBA Draft.
Gray, a 6’1″, 190 lbs junior guard from Toronto, Ontario has been terrorizing Canadian university basketball since his freshman season — cementing his legacy as a two-time MVP and scoring champion with a ridiculous 26.3 points per game career average in three full-seasons with the Voyageurs.
The 2016-17 U Sports rookie of the year award winner took the league by storm — leading the country in scoring as a freshman with 23.2 points per game. He finished second in his sophomore season with 24.4 points per game and led the nation in assists total with 141.
He took his game to a different stratosphere in his junior season — increasing his league-leading output to the third highest scoring average in Canadian university hoops since 1981-1982 with 31 points per game.
Calgary Dinos’ all-time great’s Richard Bohn and Karl Tilleman both led the nation with higher and ironically, identical scoring averages.
Both Bohn and Tilleman averaged 32.8 points per game. Bohn doing it during the 1995-1996 season and Tilleman, a two-time Canadian Olympian and NBA draft pick dominating the league in 1981-82 — before Canada’s adoption of the three-point line.
Not a one-trick-pony, Gray averaged 7.4 rebounds and 6.2 assists, 1.6 steals in 34.1 minutes per game.
Gray erupted for a career-high 48 points in a 101-81 win over the Lakehead Thunderwolves — shooting 13-of-23 from the floor and burying 19-of-20 shots from the foul-line on November 3rd, 2018.
He delivered his third 40-plus point game of his career with another impressive performance — 16-of-29 shooting against the Ryerson Rams on February 9th, 2019 — his lowest scoring output of the season was 23 points on multiple occasions.
Gray also represented Canada during the FIBA Basketball World Cup process playing in games against Venezuela and Brazil.
Prior to Laurentian, Gray honed his skills as a two-time athlete at Eastern Commerce Collegiate for three-years — leaving track and field (high jump, 100 meters) in the rear-view mirror and transferring to rival Oakwood Collegiate to conclude his high school career.
Additionally, with a record number of Canadian players in the NCAA tossing their names in the draft process we should expect 2019 to be the biggest year for
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